


The Girl I Knew

by Fishyz9



Category: Days of Our Lives
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-12
Updated: 2014-03-12
Packaged: 2018-01-15 12:22:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1304746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fishyz9/pseuds/Fishyz9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Summary: Will, no longer playing it safe and at the end of his tether after finding Nick in his home, finally says everything he’s always wanted to say to Gabi.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Girl I Knew

She tilts her chin up at me, defiant. With her arms crossed like that and her hip cocked out to the side, it used to be that when she looked like this I felt proud of her, but that was when she was standing up for something good. Now it’s just smug. It’s blunt and cold, and that’s because she knows her cause, her reason for speaking to me this way is entirely selfish, and she’s daring me to call her on it so that she can play the wounded, single mother with no choice but to leave this hostile environment.

I can’t even yell anymore. I’m too exhausted by her constant back and forth between innocent friend and vicious, catty woman. I’m exhausted by the disappointment that is her.

“Well?”

Nick left two minutes ago, grinning over his shoulder as he went, victorious. She let him in our house. She actually did that. Apparently not for the first time, either, and neither of them cares how much that hurts me. I asked Sonny to take a walk because I could tell he was a second away from screaming at her, and that would only fuel her martyrdom. I just hope he doesn’t go after Nick, because as sweet and caring a guy as he is, he has his limits.

She shuffles her feet slightly, unnerved by my silence. “Go ahead, start yelling. Give me your orders, I’m getting used to it.”

If I had the energy I’d roll my eyes. Oh, what a sweet, innocent little victim she is. All I have energy enough for is to sit here on this sofa; my shoulders slumped as I stare at Ari’s favorite bunny I hold in my hands.

“You really do have a low opinion of me, don’t you?” I mumble.

“Excuse me?”

“You know what I miss?” I ask, ignoring her question. “Your smile. I miss your smile.”

She blinks at me, clearly thrown.  “My―? I _smile_.” And there’s the indignation.

“No you don’t.” I shake my head. “Not unless Ari is doing something cute.”

“Okay, if you’re not going to make any sense then I’m just going to―” she starts to leave.

“Back in the day, even when we were just friends, if you walked into a room and smiled at me it was like I knew I was looking at a true friend.” I let out a sigh. “It’s not like that anymore. It hasn’t been like that for a long time.”

She glares at me. “You know what, Will?”

“―In fact it hasn’t been like that since you knew Nick was blackmailing me and I realized that you were going to let him.”

She practically sputters. “I told you I’d let you see the baby! I told you I _wanted_ you to be a part of her life!”

“Oh how _big_ of you, Gabi.” I growl at her, my voice low as I look her in the eye. And I’m not sure what my face looks like but it makes her eyes go wide. “The correct response would have been outrage. It would have been you ripping up those goddamn papers and putting Nick in his place.”

“Will, your mother―”

“Don’t you dare. You went into early labor because you weren’t looking after yourself. And if stress did have anything to do with it? Then you were getting just as much of it from Nick as you were my mother. You _allowed_ Nick to cut me out of my daughter’s life because it suited you. You and your murderer matched the pretty little picture you had in your head.”

“ _Don’t you call him that_.” She hisses, her arms dropping and her hands balling into fists by her sides.

I stand slowly, gripping that bunny in my hands. “I’m sorry, how about rapist?”

“He didn’t―”

“Because you hit him in the head with a rock.”

“He made a _mistake_.”

“A mistake is misplacing your keys, Gabi. He tried to rape you.”

Her face twists into something ugly. I can’t believe I never saw it before. Sonny was right, he’d been right all along about her, but I wouldn’t listen.

“Nick’s right about you” she says, unknowingly mirroring my thoughts in a roundabout way. “You _are_ smug.”

I grit my teeth. “He stands here in my living room, after everything he’s done to me, _smirking_ , and you have the nerve to call _me_ smug?”

“You just won’t let any of it go, will you?”

“He tried to rape you, Gabi. He. Tried. To. Rape. You.”

“ _Tried_ to. He didn’t actually―”

“And if there hadn’t been a rock within reach, Gabi? Would you still be defending him?”

Her face twists again, and goddamn, it is the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen. If only all of those modelling agencies could see her now.

“What if, what if, _what if_.” She mimics. “You may be stuck in the past, Will, but I’m not. I’m capable of forgiveness.”

“This isn’t forgiveness. This is _fear_.”

“Oh, so you’re a psychiatrist now? Am I talking to Will or Marlena?”

“You’re talking to Will, the guy you have betrayed more times than I can count.”

Her jaw drops, and she laughs an empty, hollow laugh. “Do you know how many times I’ve stuck up for you in the past?”

“When it counted? Yes: zero.”

“I can’t believe you.” She shakes her head, and it’s so clear that she believes her own lie.

I grip that bunny tight in my hands, trying to hide my upset. “You let him manipulate and corner me; you helped him to push me out of the picture when you were pregnant.”

“That was your decision to make. Man-up, Will, take responsibility.”

“You cut me off from everyone and played on my every insecurity. You let it happen. And then when I made it clear that I couldn’t step back? You let him off the leash; you let that psychopath go unchecked and practically destroy my life so that you could play happy families with someone who wasn’t queer.”

“I have _never_ had a problem with you being gay!”

“No, you haven’t. But you’re so weak that you let it be the catalyst for everything that happened next.” I shrug helplessly. “You’re so insecure about being rejected by men that the first guy―a murderer, no less―to call you pretty became more important to you than anything else.”

“ _Stop_ that. Stop making it sound like it was nothing. We were married for Christ’s sake.”

I groan slightly, closing my eyes for a second. “That wasn’t a marriage; you knew each other two minutes before he got down on one knee, and for reasons that had nothing to do with love and everything to do with bigotry. In fact, no, you didn’t _know_ him at all, so stop saying that like it means something. You two were a joke from day one, and you still are.”

“Go to hell.” She gasps out, trying to walk past me, but I grab her arm and force her back into the spot she was stood in a moment ago. She yanks her arm out of my grip.

“ _Then_ ,” I continue. “You let that bastard cut me out of her life a second time.”

“No, I did _not_. I told you you’d always be a part of her life.”

“Thank you for the bread crumbs, Gabi.”

“Don’t be like that” she says with a catch in her voice.

“It wasn’t your place to determine how involved I would be in her life. It wasn’t your place to decide who she would call _daddy_. You should have been furious with Nick, but you weren’t, because you didn’t want to be alone, even if that meant letting me down.”

She starts to deflate, her bravado fading away as she begins to once again resemble the girl I once knew with every truth that comes out of my mouth. She’s like a pan of water over a flame, only Nick is that flame, and it’s only when he’s close by that she becomes this volatile, _horrible_ woman. The further he walks away from the apartment, the calmer she is.

“Why can’t you just let me be happy?” she whispers. “Why must you control me?”

I set my lips in a grim line. “Are those his words, or yours?”

She doesn’t answer.

I cross my arms over my chest. “I need you to hear this, I need you to take it in for what it is, and remember it the next time he starts whispering his lies into your ear…” I clench my jaw. “This has _never_ been about you.”

She lets out a hurt, disbelieving sound.

“It’s true that I don’t want him near you because I know, I _know_ he’ll hurt you again, but the more you betray me the less I actually care…”

“Why do you keep saying that? That I’ve betrayed you?”

“You let him into our _house_.” I bite out. 

“I live here too! You two can’t dictate―!”

“Why the hell do you think I sent Sonny away? Hmm?” I don’t wait for her to answer. “It’s because I know you’ll play the victim and say you’re being ganged up on. Well…” I hold my arms out either side of me, looking around. “It’s just you and me, Gabi. There are only two of us in this conversation, and _no_ one is dictating to you.”

“Then what do you call telling me who I can and cannot have over, then?”

“A lie. That’s what I call it.”

“You just this minute sent Nick away!”

“Because he made my life a living _hell_ , Gabi!” I yell, my voice cracking slightly and making her eyes go wide. “Trying to cut me out of my daughter’s life twice wasn’t enough for him; he had to give it a third shot. He couldn’t get rid of me so he tried to pluck you out of Salem.” I run my hands through my hair, exasperated. “Why isn’t that enough for you to hate him?”

She swallows hard. “We have a bond.”

“No.” I shake my head. “He calls you pretty. He strokes your ego. You have an _admirer_.”

She narrows her eyes at me. “You just love to make me feel small, don’t you? It’s like you think no one else in the world but you and your boyfriend get to be happy.”

“First off, that is the very last time you will refer to him as the boyfriend. Second? I don’t have to make you feel small, _he_ does that. He makes you feel reliant on him and you don’t even see it.” I shrug helplessly. “And it’s not even the first time he’s done it.”

“You’re being cruel.” She whispers.

“I’m being honest. I’ve let you get away with too much because I still remember the friend you used to be to me before Nick Fallon entered the picture.” I shake my head. “No more, I have a daughter to look out for now.”

Her face twists in confusion, and I continue before she can ask. “Like I said, Gabi. This was never about you.”

She lets out a humorless laugh and rolls her eyes. “And we’re back to you thinking Nick is going to eat Arianna.”

“If he’s around you then he’s around my daughter, and that just isn’t going to happen.”

“You don’t get to make that decision.”

“I will do everything in my power to protect my daughter, seeing as you won’t.”

She takes an angry step forwards. “ _Excuse_ me?”

“You’re putting your own happiness before your own daughter’s wellbeing.”

“Nick is not a threat to―!”

“He is a murdering, kidnapping, manipulating, lying, blackmailing, attempted _rapist_ , Gabi!” I yell at her, and she takes a step back. “Now take yourself out of the picture for a second, take yourself out of this conversation and imagine we were talking about someone else. Someone else who was happy to let a monster like that around their baby if it meant having someone there to tell them they’re beautiful, someone there to _sleep_ with. What the hell would you call a person like that?”

She looks at me like she hates me, well and truly hates me. Maybe she does.

“You’d call that person a bad mother, and don’t you deny it.”

“I am not…” she says shakily, her eyes glistening with dampness, but she can’t bring herself to finish that sentence. “I can’t believe you just said that.”

“Neither can I. It’s not anything I thought I’d ever be saying about you, but it’s true.”

A tear drops down the curve of her cheek, and she hugs her middle. “You get that we’re done now, right? You and me?” she whispers, shaking her head. “Done.”

“We were done the second you let him into this house.”

 She shakes her head again, sadly this time. “I don’t know why you can’t just let it go.”

“Because it’s a slap in the face, Gabi.” I say, reaching for Ari’s bunny again, and walking over to the sofa to sit down.  I look up at her, and then down at the seat beside me. Slowly, and like the world has settled firmly on her shoulders, she sits beside me.

I let out a deep breath, looking up to the ceiling for a second, and then back at her. “I’ve never told anyone this,” I begin, my voice barely above a whisper. “But…when it all came out, in that small window where I knew I wasn’t going to be a father, where I’d let Nick make a coward of me, and when…when I lost Sonny. Gabi…” I look at her. “I didn’t want to live.”

Her eyes snap up and meet mine, shocked. “I…what?”

“I…I thought of nothing else but just getting into my car, pointing it at a brick wall, and slamming my foot down on the gas.”

Her hand creeps out as if she’s about to reach for me, but then she pulls it back, unable to now make that connection because of all the things that have been said.

“He made me feel hopeless.” I choke out, my vision blurring. “That’s what he did, that’s the type of person he is, Gabi. He took away all of my hope. And your lack of integrity, your inability to be loyal, your capacity to stab me in the back…all it did was make it that much easier for him.” I swallow hard. “He made me want to die.”

“Will…” she whispers, her expression devastated. “I never wanted...I never wanted any of that.”

“So to see him standing here…” I continue, “…In my home, a few feet away from where my daughter is sleeping…” I shake my head. “That’s a pretty clear indication of how much respect you have for me. To let him into our lives after everything he’s done…to stand there brazenly unapologetic, daring me to fight you on this…” I can’t finish my sentence; I can’t even look at her any more.

“I didn’t know…”

“You don’t get to use that excuse anymore. You knew _enough_.”

“I would never want to cause you pain…”

“And yet you do, again and again.” I quickly wipe the back of my hand over my eyes and sniff loudly. “I just can’t trust you. You threw me under the bus when you became pregnant. You’re throwing my mother and grandmother under the bus now…”

“I am not responsible for what they―”

I snap my head up to look at her. “Don’t you _dare_.” I bite out. “Get this through your thick head right now: your crime is not _their_ crime, understand? He isn’t dead, but he is walking around with a scar on his head courtesy of you.”

“He forgives me.”

“He’s obsessed with you.”

“Sami and Kate―”

“Risked everything to help you. _Everything_. And now you’re letting them take the fall for you.” I shake my head, disgusted. “You are treacherous; Gabi, _treacherous_. And right now I feel sick even looking at you.”

Any compassion in her gaze quickly melts away to be replaced by a cold, calculating look that resembles a certain murderer’s eyes to a startling degree. “You think a lot of yourself.”

I stare at her. “The only power he has is the power _you_ give him. The only person letting all of this happen is you. It doesn’t matter to you how much we risk for you, take care of you, forgive you…you just keep digging that knife into my back.”

“Now who’s playing the victim?” She says quietly.

“I’m allowed.” I say firmly and with more strength in my voice. “I _was_ the victim, remember?”

She frowns at me, and I’m stunned to realize that she hasn’t a clue as to what I’m referring to. “I saved his _life_.” I spit out. “I took a _bullet_ for him, after everything he’d done.”

She glances away, her cheeks flushing ever so slightly.

“But none of that matters, does it? Not to you, and sure as hell not to him.”

I watch her, but she says nothing. Eventually she stands, sweeping away the invisible creases in her skirt. “I think we need to end this conversation.”

I stand. “We’re nearly done.”

She looks at me, raising an eyebrow, and suddenly we’re facing off; it’s finally come to this. “This is what’s going to happen.”

“Don’t presume to tell me what to do.”

“There’s no presuming about it. You and I are going to get something set out legally on paper. We’re going to have joint custody.”

I see a flash of panic in her eyes. “I thought you didn’t want that?”

“You’ve given me no choice and you’ve made it more than clear that I can’t trust you not to screw me over.”

“I’m her mother, she comes with me.”

“I’m her father and I don’t let psychopaths near her, neither do I storm out of the apartment, leaving her behind whenever I have a tantrum.”

She grits her teeth. “You will not take her away from me.”

I smile sadly at her, shaking my head. “That right there is the difference between me and you. See, I know that to take Ari’s mother away from her would hurt her, so I would never do that. However, I know for a fact where this is going …”

She lifts her chin at me, silently telling me to continue.

“You’re going to let that bastard back into your life, if you haven’t already, and eventually you’re going to let him convince you to let him take my place.”

“Don’t be such a queen” she snaps irritably.

I take a deep, steady breath, raising my eyebrow at her. It takes only a second for what she said to reach her own ears, and suddenly there’s heat slamming into her cheeks. She has the good grace to look mortified.  

“I…I meant drama queen.” She says softly, but I can tell she’s managed to shock even herself.

“You sound more and more like him every day.”

She takes a quick, panicked step forward. “Will, I…I did _not_ mean that, I swear.”

“It’s going to be fifty fifty.” I ignore her. “Three days and four days, alternating each week. If one of us has an exam we’ll work it out―make it easy for each other.”

Her hand tries to rest on my forearm, but my arms are crossed. “Will, I am not that person. I didn’t mean that, I promise.”

“You can stay here, Sonny and I will find somewhere else, but we _will_ have joint custody.”

She lets out an unsteady breath and quickly covers her face. “Okay, okay let’s just stop for a second. Let’s stop and think calmly. We’ve both said things that we―”

“I meant every word. I do not trust you, and I do not want to live with you anymore.”

“You said nothing had to change!”

“This has nothing to do with Sonny and me getting married. We would have been happy to live with you for however long you wanted. You were _family_ to us, Gabi.”

“I don’t want to lose that.” She whispers shakily.

“You already have.”

“But, Ari…”

“Ari will be safe from Nick. She’ll have her mom, she’ll have her dads…but if I find out you’ve let that bastard near our daughter?”  I level her with my gaze; I try to say with one look that I am not fucking around. “If you let him touch my daughter, _that’s_ when things between you and I turn nasty, understand? If you care about me at all, if you have any hope of trying to repair this mess between us….just, please don’t let it reach that point.”

She stares at me, shell shocked, and I step away from her, biting my lip and knowing that I may have very well just started world war three, but I feel lighter somehow.

“Me and Sonny, we’ll pack up a few things and stay at the Kiriakis mansion tonight, Ari can stay with you at night until we find an apartment or a house close by, and we’ll continue to pay the rent here until you get sorted…but…”

“But?” She whispers.

I lift one shoulder, feeling sad that it’s come to this, that the girl I knew has allowed it to come to this. “It’s like you said, this…” I gesture between us, “… is done.” I look at her for a second longer. “You and I are done.”

I turn, not even glancing back at her, and go to check on my daughter.

 


End file.
